even in death... you are so beautiful!!

There was this little girl I met...
she had eyes so little, as if they were two little stars, jolly, and they would actually twinkle!
nose was tiny and flat, i would look at her and wonder how she breathes, but she manages to survive!
the tiny, soft head had  strands of hair I could count but they were long! Eyebrows so faint!
 Her lips were pretty and promised sweetness upon being kissed. she would sleep most of the time with her little fists, straight, fingers folded!  An ivory neck, pretty as ever!

So divine was her beauty that she looked enchanting even when she lay dead! yeah she died, her body into pieces.... she left for other world, where things were supposed to be more beautiful, more peaceful, where love spoke!

She was diagnosed of PARENTOSIS!!

in the pursuit of 'Happiness'.....

 Happiness... is something we are in search of all the time. Every age group, both the sexes, the rich and the poor.   A child seeks happiness in the toys, which are his own till he grows up and shuns them. Soon the child grows and seeks happiness in the company of his mates and learning new ways to live, upon reaching adolescence he seeks happiness in his new found love (do not confuse happiness with pleasure!! ).

When the child is grown up, the periphery of the term Happiness grows with him. He soon has has a number of ways of seeking happiness, a number of ''to-do'' lists in a day.

He never realizes that that his search for happiness has soon turned into a desperate run to satisfy his desires!

To be candid, Desires are the evil. they make you suffer, they are unreasonable at times, they are ambitious, they are sky high. Desires know no bar. Desires are crazy.
Gautam Buddha rightly quoted-                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           There is suffering in this world
                                                      The suffering has a cause
                                                                   The cause is Desire.


Well everybody is aware of these things, just that we deliberately make them passive. We throw these lovely quotes at the back of our minds. the world is flashy, glittering. And, you must have learnt  this proverb in school- 'All that glitters is not Gold'.

Gone are those saints who curbed their desires in the pursuit of happiness,  We can never be saints, we shouldn't try. Recently, I read a punchline. The punchline of a commercially available beverage and it said- 'Greed is good, baby!'

Greed is good, if you are seeking happiness whole heartedly, without harming others. I, in the pursuit of happiness have gone to lengths. But happiness seems to be playing hide and seek.. at times Happiness says  (it/he/she) 'loves me'. Next moment, has a change of mind.  Slips away like sand between my fingers.... but then when I start walking, gets into my shoes and tickles. I love Happiness. I sure do. Happiness - desires- love- happy life. Thats how I feel I can make my life perfect.

If i have succeeded in confusing you with this blog, I would like some comments pouring in.

The picture in this blog might not seem relevant. A sea shore for Happiness???
yes it is the sea shore for HAPPINESS!

The little guy on the street...

As I take a casual walk with my friends in the evening, I discover that the road leading to my house was being dug (for some reason, I don't know). I managed to hop and skip and jump and hit the main road with two of my friends. There I see a young guy jumping and splashing water at a construction site. He was as carefree as can be and must have had some happy song playing inside his little mind (I presume, thats how my adult brain thinks!). Watching him was delightful. I was carrying my camera with me (again, I never carry a camera for evening walks!!) I clicked him, at the first attempt I was unsuccessful but at the second attempt he posed for me (and stopped splashing water for ones!!!). He won my heart at the first look, who said love at first site was for fairy tales!

He is the little guy

I started walking again with my friends, talking and laughing and yes, cribbing about everything wrong that has happened and could happen!

After five minutes we settled down for a cup of tea, but the little guy still ruled my mind and he had acquired a position in my heart. I came back home and started thinking about him.

My own questions were my answers. There are thousands of street children I see everyday, born to beggars and are often results of rapes. I don't know what this little guy was a result of (I don't want to think). If you put a hundred of these children in a pit, I am sure it would seem like a pit full of HIV/AIDS infested pool.

These children are just born, and yes, without fate! They are not aware who their biological parents are, are exploited at a very young age,  girls often end up in brothels even before they know to differentiate between men and women.
What happens to these people when they grow up? Yes, they are future, potential drug peddlers, thieves, pick pockets and may be, rapists. So this is a viscous cycle that goes on. The innocence of my little guy, will be killed in a year or two and may be after few years he will be hooting at me or targeting my wallet!

I will not comment on what should be done and what has to be done for the destitute and the beggars on the roads. I, sitting at home, with a cup of coffee, a laptop, one of the best mobile phones available in the market, have no right to criticize the government but it is interesting to get into the mind of my little guy.

It is really difficult to guess what he must be thinking and why did he decide to pose after some failed attempts. Must have thought, 'Oh man, crazy woman  is after my life, let me just pose and finish off'  or ' city girls like me  yeah!' or, possibly, 'yeah, one of those people who come, from India and abroad, photograph me and go away, I am a picture in their news papers and magazines, or may be art galleries and exhibitions.' Hmm... that is what even I am doing!

I wish I had a few qualities of Anton Chekhov, who stepped into the mind of 9 year old Vanka, and analysed what his heavy heart must have craved for at that tender age. Well, I cannot be Chekhov, even wishing so is extremely ambitious.
I never saw the little guy again. I don't know who he was, what he meant, but he did leave imprints of his little footsteps on my mind and heart. He represents those thousands of children who can be molded, but are a waste.

The Exotic Death...

Good fences make GOOD neighbours

India tested Prithvi II today and Pakistan got done with Ghauri  yesterday, both ballistic missiles capable of carrying 500-1000kgs of nuclear and conventional warheads.. Oh Yes! India tested 2 of them... I guess it was a reply to Pakistan's Ghauri. I see a similarity in the trend of the tests. In 1998, India tested 5 and  Pakistan tested 6 of the nukes, an extra as a reply to the 1975 peaceful explosion under Indira Gandhi.

India follows a' no first use' (NFU) policy for its nuclear doctrine, which definitely is inclusive of the second strike capability. But, on 21 October 2010, minor changes brought in the Minimum Credible Deterrence when the NFU was directed only for states which do not possess nuclear weapons and Pakistan is definitely not one of those states.
South Asia has been described as a- 'TINDER BOX WAITING TO EXPLODE'. This term seems so true with both the states strengthening their military capabilities. I wonder where is NPT and CTBT? With both the states not scared of international reactions and sanctions and happily declaring their nuclear might.

 According to Neorealist Kenneth Waltz, more is better, I wonder if the it is really better for both India and Pakistan. The arms race is not over yet, its just worsened and will continue to worsen in the future with advancements in the chemical and biological warfare.

 With India's growing economic gap between the rich and the poor and Pakistan going into debt every second, sharpening knives (the nukes of course) dosen't look like  feasible option to me.

These are making the future more insecure and prone to nuclear war and in these situations I absolutely really on one word... Nadjezhda!

Nadjezhda.. a hope

My very first blog.... Nadjezhda! 

Nadjezhda (надежда) is a Russian word meaning HOPE....  The word holds great importance in my life and I am sure in your life too. I have chosen to call my very first blog, my wi- fi router and little room Nadjezhda!
  To my eyes, the world runs on 'hopes'. A child is born with hopes of being protected and one dies with the hopes of meeting the loved ones in the next life.... between this journey of birth and death, we live on hopes!. Try counting how many times you use the word 'hope' in a day, in your regular day to day speech. Hope is that little string which holds us together and keeps us running.

With this onset of a brand new year, I wish to keep the hopes in me alive till I die.. do you??